Just End Their Season: The Revenge Of The Patriots

The New England Patriots suffered a heartbreaking loss to the Indianapolis Colts in what was being billed as "The Game Of The Year" 35-34 last week. The only way to rebound from an embarrassing loss is by dominating your next opponent and beating them like they wrote "Transformers 2: The Revenge Of The Fallen" (I'm still mad about Skids & Mudflap, sue me!). Had the Celtics lost in Madison Square Garden the Patriots would've been required to win this game by 50 then impregnate all the the Jets wives, girlfriends, siblings of legal consenting age as well as their cheerleaders. Luckily, Kevin Garnett made that unnecessary by hitting a last second jumper in OT *Whew!*.

The Patriots jumped out to a big lead and continued to run the ball down the Jets throats with the underwhelming running of Laurence Maroney (22 rushes for 77 yards & 2 TD's) and the reliable receiving threat Wes Welker (15 catches for 192 yards). The lead was up to 24-0 before a fumble & a blocked punt lead to a 24-7 halftime lead. Stephen "Goldentoe" Gostkowski became the NFL leader in scoring but he also managed to miss a 40 yard FG before the half. This shit needs to stop as every point counts as we near the playoffs.

The Patriots completely dominated the game although they just took the 3rd quarter off. The Jets narrowed the lead to 24-14 before the Patriots went right back to work. They threw the ball effectively and managed to eek out 27 1st downs to the Jets' 12. The Patriots held the ball for 40 of the game's 60 minutes and Dirty Sanchez lived up to his name by going 8-21 for 136 yards 1 TD & 4 INT's...his leading receiver on the night was Leigh Bodden (this is bad because Leigh Bodden plays for the Patriots). The Patriots won 31-14 to go to 7-3 on the season and retain a 2 game lead in the AFC East division.

Tom Brady set another Patriots record for consecutive 300 yard games (somewhere Drew Bledsoe is extremely pissed off) as he went 28-41 for 310 yards & 1 TD to Randy Moss (5 catches for 34 yards & 1 TD). Kevin Faulk continued to be a workhorse with 4 catches for 53 yards & a couple of carries of the night. Julian Edelman also came up big as they'll be receiving Sammy Morris back next week when they face the undefeated New Orleans Saints in New Orleans November 30th on Monday Night Football. If the Patriots can manage to win this game then it will become the new "Game Of The Year"...that is unless they can get to the Super Bowl.

One.