Sunday, October 25, 2009

The Bears play the Bengals today


BEEZY~!

...And the big storyline is the reunion of the Chicago Bears football team and the rejuvenated former first-round bust, Cedric Benson. It seems that after three pretty awful years with the Bears, marked by incessant whining, absolute non-productivity, and a couple alcohol-related arrests, the dude has turned it all around in Cincinnati, and has been one of the top running backs in the league, all while apparently being a model teammate for a change. And hey, good for him. A change of scenery did the dude good, I'm a sucker for redemption stories, and the last few games notwithstanding, the Bears came out okay in the deal with Matt Forte in his place, anyway. So for the Bears' sake, I hope he doesn't do very well today, but hey, good luck dude, and nice job so far.

Wait, no. What I meant to say was:

Fuck you, Cedric Benson. Fuck you and your draft day-crying, "I'll be the starter by week two" ass. Fuck your stupid face, fuck your stupid mouth, and fuck all the money we had to pay you to bring Gatorade to Thomas Jones. Eat a hundred dicks and choke on dick #101, Cedric Benson. I hope Lance Briggs breaks all eight of your legs, you spider. I am telling you that I dislike you, and that you should feel bad for this, Cedric Benson. You are so terrible.

But yeah, I think the Bears are going to lose today.

1 comment:

Raven Mack said...

lololol, I was reading the 1st paragraph like, "what the fuck?"